National One-Hit Wonder Day

Evidently it is National One-Hit Wonder Day today. For all those bands and artists that thad their 15 minu...er, seconds in the sun, now they have a little bit more.

You know, after hearing about this, and then reading more into the Talk Like a Pirate Day (in which some guys just decided to make a holiday, which is evidently all it takes), I'm starting to wonder when the National Day for schmoe's who work crappy jobs and go out drinking on the weekend is?

Oh wait, that's right. That day is every Monday, when I have to go back to work.

Oh Joy.

The Bobblehead Regime Has Begun

I don't know if you have noticed over the last few years, but what I call the "bobblehead" picture has become increasingly popular in graphic design. What do I mean when I say "bobblehead" picture? Well, like the image above, it is a picture taken at such an angle that the head and upper body appears disproportionately larger than the feet and lower body.

I can only imagine why this has become the "in" thing to do for graphic designers. One theory involves a cheap photographic trick producing an interesting graphical production. Another theory involves 8 year old humor and dick and fart jokes.

Of course, my thought is that the creator of the bobblehead is secretly trying to take over the global economy, one bobble at a time. The first step was sporting events, and then specially created figurines for weddings and anniverseries. Now we are on the next phase of the plan, which is taking over the internet. From there, the sky's the limit.

Top 11 Dirty Sounding Words

11) Prong
10) Quiver
9) Spackle
8) Kumquat
7) Drizzle
6) Juices
5) Caulk
4) Mustache
3) Masticate
2) Pianist
1) Moist

There you have it, the Top 11 dirtiest sounding words that I could think up. And not only that, but a link to images that Google thinks these words evoke.

And, as you can see, the words only sound dirty.

Who's Responsible? I have my ideas...

Us Debt in Trillions, 1938-2004

George Bush I and II: 2.75 trillion dollars added to the deficit.
Republicans: 5 trillion dollars added.
Democrats: 2 billion dollars added.

My 21st Birthday Napkins

When I was in college, for your 21st birthday, everyone that you knew went to the bar in town (yes, there was only one bar in town at that time). Since things tended to get a little hectic, being someone's 21st birthday and all, it was somebody's job to write down everything of import that happened on the bar napkins, and then you could look over them the next day as you were wondering what the hell happened the night before.

Anyway, I just ran across mine from 7 years ago, and I thought that I would share. Here goes (TS is me):

• 9:02-Raspberry Kamikaze


• 9:05-Stoplight (shot of something red, shot of something yellow, shot of something green). TS-"Do you want my keys now?" JB-"No, we'll just reach down your pants later."


• 9:08-Long Island Iced Tea


• 9:19-TS is threatened by big hicks


• 9:20-'Desperado' on the jukebox, TS rides the fences.


• 9:23-TS tries to say "The Skunk Thump the Stump Thunk".


• 9:24-Was that a whip cream bra? JB and TS head bang.


• 9:29-Lemon Drop


• 9:31-Kelly feels up Ivana. At least they are roommates.


• 9:32-Three wise men (shot of Johnnie Walker, shot of Jack Daniels, and a shot of Jim Beam)


• 9:33-TS spills one of the wise men, because whiskey tastes like ass!


• 9:35-Bartender tells Brooke to keep her shirt on.


• 9:36-Brooke feels up camera


• 9:37-Makes it past Ron's 21st, who only made it 31 minutes from first drink to puking.


• 9:41-Kelly "I can't find the hole!"


• 9:58-Rum and Coke


• 10:10-TS and JB "go to the bathroom together"


• 10:13-JB returns, where's TS? "Trying to pee"


• 10:14-TS returns, pee successful.


• 10:17-One nice drink, and one mean drink, from Apu


• 10:19-Takes mean drink, "It's Evil!" "This is what went on top of our Christmas tree!" (Jack Daniels) "No, we put the beer on the tree."


• 10:21-Takes nice drink, wants another. Bartender won't tell what it was, TS accuses bartender of only becoming a bartender to be like Tom Cruise.


• 10:23-Ivana "Have you felt her muscle in a while?" TS "No, that's for later" "I'm so flat that I make the walls jealous"


• 10:24-TS "I'm drunk, I'm insistent, don't play this game with me."


• 10:25-TS "strikes a pose"


• 10:26-Kelly threatens throwing a dart into Seth's face


• 10:31-TS spills in his crotch, asks if anyone wants to help clean it up


• 10:33-TS talks shit, then hits funny bone very hard. Karma's a bitch


• 10:36-TS puts moves on Mimi, talks about "pussilishish" things


• 10:37-"I will comve over and kick your ass, bitch! That was my nose!"


• 10:44-Amaretto Sour.


• 10:45-TS feels up camera


• 10:50-Prairie Fire. TS "No Katilla", refuses to drink.


• 10:51-Clay drinks Prairie Fire.


• 10:52-Sex on the Beach


• 10:55-"You know how that guy fell over? Well, I just knocked over a table."


• 10:57-"I woke up one morning, looked into the mirror and scared the shit out of myself"


• 11:03-TS draws a middle finger on his hand


• 11:04-Bottle Cap


• 11:09-TS wants Janaki soooo bad. Brooke licks Janaki's hand.


• 11:31-Brooke calls TS a pussy, so TS drinks the ketchup.


• 11:33-"Dick is good"


• 11:35-TS shows his ass


• 11:36-TS steals Clay's glasses


• 11:42-Vomit time

As you can see, sometime not a whole lot happens. But sometimes it is nice to know just how much you drank, who you hit on, who hit on you, what random quotes were said, etc.

Now go out there and get Napkining!

The Ipod Nano

I'm not sure if you are aware of this yet, but Apple has come out with a new product, the Apple Ipod Nano. Basically, it is a smaller version of the Ipod in a 2 Gig or 4 Gig version, in black or white. Here are some specs for you:

• Flash-based iPod


• Only .27 inches thick and 1.5 ounces


• 1.5 inch color LCD display screen


• Holds up to 1,000 songs (4 Gig version)


• Familiar ClickWheel functionality


• 14 hours of use on a single battery charge


• Earbud headphones, USB cable and Dock adapter included

Sounds pretty good, doesn't it? Well, it is about to sound better. You can sign up to get a free Ipod Nano with this link. It is the same deal as the free ipod and the free flat screen deals from Gratis Internet. Just click on the link, sign up, skip over the "optional" surveys (the most annoying part, but don't worry, it won't take long and they don't show up again), and then complete an option. I recommend the eFax option, as it is free, and easy to use. After that, send the link to your friends, and the Ipod Nano will soon be winging it's way to your door. It's that easy.

And honestly, wouldn't a free Ipod Nano really brigthen up your day?

Gas Prices

I got this email from a friend, and decided that I may as well pass the message along to you. Here is the meat of it:

I hear we are going to hit close to $3.00 a gallon by the summer. We need to take some intelligent, united action.

Phillip Hollsworth, offered this good idea:

For the rest of this year, DON"T purchase ANY gasoline from the two biggest companies (which now are one), EXXON and MOBIL. If they are not selling any gas, they will be inclined to reduce their prices. If they reduce their prices, the other companies will have to follow suit.

But to have an impact, we need to reach literally millions of Exxon and Mobil gas buyers. It's really simple to do!! Now, don't whimp (sic) out on me at this point.. keep reading and I'll explain how simple it is to reach millions of people!! I am sending this note to about thirty people. If each of you send it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300)... and those 300 send it to at least ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000) ... and so on, by the time the message reaches the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE MILLION consumers! Etc. Etc. You get the idea.

HOLD OUT UNTIL THEY LOWER THEIR PRICES TO THE $1.30 RANGE AND KEEP THEM DOWN. THIS MAY REALLY WORK

The problem that I see with this chain-mail is the effect that Katrina will have on gas prices. I have already seen pictures of gas prices in the $5-6-7 range, and heard stories of gas stations running out. I even spent $2.80 a gallon for gas at Costco, the lowest priced gas station in Seattle, usually by $0.10-0.15. Basically, because the oil rigs were hit so hard in the Gulf Coast, gas prices are jumping like crazy (even in the Pacific Northwest), and I don't think that a concentrated effort to stop buying ExxonMobil gas will have much effect at all, at least for the next 3-6 months.

I also like how the author of the article ends buy saying that "this may really work". No guarantees, no promises, just a "may" work. Talk about covering your own ass.

But, I've done my job. I've spread the word, and if this does work, I helped in some small part. And that is covering my own ass.

The Wedding Crashers

I went to see The Wedding Crashers this past weekend, with Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, and Rachel McAdams (and also Christopher Walken).

First things first, Rachel McAdams was hot in this movie. I don't know if she is a real brunette, or just went that way for this movie, but it is a change for the better in my humble opinion. Now that I have that out of the way, I can get to other things.

Other things being that Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson are hilarious. They have a great charisma that really shows through in the movie. I got the feeling that half the time the actors were really laughing at Vince and Owen (can I presume to call them by their first names?) because they were just ad-libbing the script as they went along, and it turned out great. I hope that these two stick together and make a few more movies down the road with each other.

It is also about time that comedies moved into the "R" ratings, because all the "PG-13" jokes are tired and used. There is a whole new realm of comedy out there, waiting to be tapped. Think Eddie Murphy "Raw", and not Eddie Murphy "Dr. Dolittle", and you'll know what I'm talking about. What? You've never seen Eddie Murphy's "Raw"?!? Well, go rent it and get ready to laugh.

If all you are looking for is a quick synopsis of the movie, a mini-review if you would, then here it is:

The more people you sleep with, the better the chance that you meet the person you are meant to be with.

There it is, in all it's glory. Now get out there and get working.

I'm speechless.

"A Million Ways" Dancing in the Courtyard

A friend of mine emailed this to me the other day, and I laughed my ass off. These guys, who are a band of pretty crazy guys, choreographed their own dance to their own song, and put in online. It is hilarious, and well worth the five minutes to watch (plus the music is pretty good too).

Check out the video here.